Growing up without a father, and with a mother who'd
convinced me Jesus was up there with an Uzi to make sure I didn't screw up, I
really never got "the talk" that lets you know what really goes on
with women. In fact, when the Beach Boys said "a competition clutch with a
four on the floor, she purrs like a kitten until her Lake pipes roar,"
they could have been describing women for all I knew. When I was 15, I guessed
in front of a Boys Club counselor that babies were "pooped out."
Then as you grow older guys tell you girls don't like guys
who are too nice, so you act badly and are left with a guilty conscience about
how you treated some girl like a rat, and you end up depressed and
dateless.
Nowadays any kid over six understands sex, but I spent way
too many years clueless.
It is interesting though how some things stay the same. In
the classes I taught at a state university a dateless guy I was helping asked
me to find out why girls don't like "good guys." The classes at my university averaged 65
percent female, 26 years of age, with Blacks and Latinas
predominating, but with some white kids thrown in to prove white people aren't
smarter than anyone else.
I asked them why they didn't like the good guys. They said
they didn't want guys who were available when they called and weren't busy. This
somehow made the guy uninteresting and they stopped liking him.
This left me confused. However, because I was married, it
was useless information. I'd found that even if a girl at 19 might not date
you, when they got to be around 28, they'd marry you because you were boring
and they trusted you.
I'm still waiting for that talk I never received, but this
time I want to see some data.
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